Thankful Thursday

I'm bringing back Thankful Thursday.
One day during the busy week to pause, reflect, and give thanks. Sounds like perfection to me.
Today, I know exactly what I'm thankful for.
Today is an easy one.
I was uploading pictures to my computer from my phone. I hadn't done this in a WHILE, so there were a lot. As I began to scroll through them, I found myself in tears. In this collection of random pictures (many, okay MOSTLY of children) I kept running across pictures of the Stirring building in various stages of the process. A picture of the Kids hallway before the ceiling was up and the counter top was installed. A shot of one of my Stirring Kids girls painting the girl's bathroom. Another one of a crew putting together a bazillion IKEA cabinets. A picture of our move-out day from the Eureka Way campus where Sean is sprawled out in the Storage Room (who knew there was actually carpet in that room?! I sure didn't!). A picture of each classroom on our last Sunday at that campus. A great shot of the classrooms prior to opening Sunday in the new building. Then there is picture after picture of the kids flooding the hallway of the Kids wing.
Chills.
I am so thankful for the process. For the road. For the journey.
I remember the hard work of setting up and tearing down Sunday after Sunday at the Eureka Way campus. I remember transforming ordinary classrooms into extraordinary places for kids to encounter God. I remember how difficult it was trying to prepare and organize the new space and make sense of ACTUALLY having our "own house." It was hard to go from living out of a suitcase (so to speak) to actually having a closet... The endless hours of cleaning and sorting and organizing and building and answering questions and building teams. It was a tireless couple of weeks.
But then I also remember the look of awe and excitement in the eyes of the kids as they came busting into the Stirring Kids hallway. I remember overhearing parents telling each other of how their kids were up HOURS early, getting ready to come to the NEW Church. I remember the wonder on the faces of those kids as they saw their classrooms for the very first time.
I wouldn't change the process for anything. Without the sacrifice and the hard work, the reward wouldn't be nearly as beautiful.
Don't forget to be thankful for the process. Even if it's hard and difficult and tiresome. Don't forget to be thankful for the process.  (Here are all of the pictures... well, not ALL of them, but some of my FAVES.... enjoy!!!)

Kids: My love.

If you know me, you know I love children. I love the way their minds work, and the way they love with their WHOLE hearts, and the way they say what they're thinking, and the way they hug your legs like it's the last time they'll see you, and they way they write you love notes.
I love kids.
They capture my heart.
I feel the most alive when I'm around kids.
God has been really bringing this passion to life in my heart lately. My constant prayer is for this generation of children to truly and completely know their identity in Christ. That they would be so deeply rooted in HIS love, that they would never question their place in this family. Wouldn't that change everything? If an entire generation grew up knowing that their Father's love is never-ending, never-failing and all-consuming. If they knew that they belonged with God, and that nothing ever can or will take that away from them. I have such faith for this. I just know that I will get to see this in my day. I will get to see these boys and girls grow up into men and women and I will get to see them step into their callings, knowing that their identity is completely rooted in who God says they are.
I love the fact that, as I pray, I get to pray for the faces of these little ones. As I ask God to capture their hearts, I see their amazing smiles. I get to pray for them by name. I get to ask God to change their lives. What a treat. I am constantly moved to tears thinking about what an honor it is to join with God and the families at the Stirring in the shaping of their children.
I can't help but think that maybe, just maybe, God has given me the story he has to keep my heart extra sensitive to these little ones. I grew up with my identity rooted in many things, none of which were God. I never truly felt like I belonged. Anywhere. It drastically changed the way I lived my life, and not in a good way. Thankfully, God rescued me. He gave me a new identity and a new song to sing. One full of joy and love and belonging. What if ever child we see at the Stirring never has to experience that? What if they knew in their heart and their mind that they are a child of God, and that who He says they are is all that matters? Wouldn't that just be the most beautiful thing ever?

We Love: The story of the Jar.

Caitlin is 10 years old.
She greets me with a huge hug and a matching smile every Sunday morning.
She has the biggest, brightest, kindest, most compassionate heart.
Over the past few months, she's been working hard.
Washing cars, lemonade stands, collecting recycling, raking leaves, doing the dishes, and I can only imagine what else.
She's been working hard and saving her pennies.
Putting them in this jar.
On Sunday, she came running up to me (as usual) and handed me this glitter-covered jar. At first, I looked at it, thinking it was something her teachers had prompted her to bring to Sunday School. But after closer examination, I realized she was bringing her hard-earned money to contribute to our church-wide "We Love" offering that was happening that day at all three gatherings to help us raise money for our new space.
My heart melted.
Tears began to run down my cheeks. I was overwhelmed by the amount of sacrifice and generosity I was seeing from this 10 year old.
Nate said a number of times that it's not how much you bring, but how much it costs you.
This jar of change was everything to Caitlin.
It was all she had.
Do you remember being 10? A quarter was a big deal!
This jar was full of quarters.
This jar was a big deal.
I know that because of her ability to give up everything for God's glory, this little girl will live an incredibly blessed life. God will overwhelm her. I'm sure of it.
I realize to some, this jar doesn't look like much. Maybe $20 work of coins. But to this 10 year old, it was months and months of hard work and sacrifice.
What an example.
And the joy she had when she was giving it... We have a lot we can learn from 10 year olds like Caitlin.

Day 4

I've said it before and I'll say it again; I love Sundays.
Sure, it's a long day.
Sure, there's a lot that goes into it from start to finish.
Sure, there are bumps along the way.
Sure, I need a quad-shot americano to help me function.
But every Sunday, I'm reminded of why I do what I do.
I get to see kids come alive.
I get to watch them learn about their place in this family.
I get to experience God revealing Himself to these little ones.
I get to encourage other leaders of the calling on their lives.
Yeah, it would be nice to sleep in.
Yeah, I'd love to have another day to check things off of my "to-do" list.
But I couldn't imagine my week without the moments I have on Sundays.
Like the mom who told me this morning that her two daughters were up at 5 AM pulling her out of bed, asking if it was time to go to church. Five. Oclock. In. The. Morning.
That's really early.
Or like the mom who told me that her 3 year old told her, while walking the beaches of Costa Rica, that she wished they could go to the Stirring in Costa Rica. They are strolling along amazingly beautiful, sandy beaches, and she's thinking about the Stirring Kids. Amazing.
Or the dad who told me that his son NEVER goes ANYWHERE without a kicking-and-screaming-and-clinging-to-his-shirt match. Except the Stirring. The look of pure joy and victory on this dad's face was enough to make me cry. (Doesn't take much, but STILL!)
Or the mom who asked me how to start a conversation with her daughter about Baptism, because the mom can see how much God is working in her daughter's life. This all coming from a mom who just met Jesus herself. And already, she can recognize the transformation in her daughter. Wow.
Or the little boy who gazed up at me with big, brown eyes and declared "Jesus lives in my heart. Forever. Did you know that? I can't wait to tell my daddy! He doesn't know Jesus yet, but he will. Because I pray for him, and so did my teacher this morning!"
Or walking with a leader who has more favor and anointing on her life than she knows, and who just pours her passion for Jesus out during the 2 hours with her class.
Or the OTHER teacher who is changing the lives of the hard-to-reach students in her class by talking to them like they MATTER, and by showing them the love and compassion of Christ.

THESE are the moments that remind me that ever early wake up, every sacrifice, every frustrating moment, every ounce of stress, every single moment of work is worth it all. Just to hear and see these stories. Just to help shape a generation to have confidence in their relationship with Jesus, and to show them the love God has for them. Just to call out the potential in a young leader who I believe has a calling on her life to change the lives of kids around the world. It's all worth it. Just to see lives changed.

My biggest prayer is for my passion to bring God fame. He's the one who has placed this passion in me. This is merely his love and desire and passion for his children living in my heart. May God get all the glory.

Today, my heart is full.
Today, my passion burns.
Today, I am thankful.

Here's a great shot of two of the littlest Stirring Kids.

Chaning of Seasons

Today was perfect.
I woke up late, spilled my coffee, got to church late, forgot a bunch of stuff, misplaced my keys, misplaced my half-spilled coffee (about a dozen times), forgot to give multiple people multiple things, left my breakfast on the kitchen counter, didn't remember that ONE really important thing for that ONE really important person... but amidst all this chaos,
Today was perfect.
Why, you ask?
Because I'm full of joy.
It's been a while.
This past season of my life has been a difficult one. For many reasons.
During the hardest parts, I remember asking the people walking the closest with me "Will I ever just have JOY again?" because, during those agonizing times, the joy wasn't there. I was full of hurt. And sorrow. And grief. And anger. And unforgiveness. And pain. Lots of pain. I never thought the joy would return. It was like, one day it was just gone. And in it's place were all of those other, difficult feelings. I couldn't figure it out... WHY pain? WHY so much of it? WHY me? WHY now?
I found myself on my face before God asking these questions everyday. So angry with him. So confused. So frustrated. Will I ever just have joy again? I began to think the answer was no.
I was wrong.
Because today, there I was, sitting in a blue pew, looking out at a group of kids, singing songs about Jesus, and my heart was overflowing with joy. Not just the "I-fee-so-happy-right-now" kind of joy. No, it was much bigger than that. That's just an emotion. This, my friends, was more like a change of season.
From a season of pain to a season of joy.
The great part about this is that, although hard times will come, they won't seem so hard now. When your posture is that of joy, even the most impossible things have a way of working themselves out.
That is why today was perfect.
It marks the beginning of a new season for me; a season of joy.
That, AND my kids (not really MY kids, but I feel that way sometimes... that's another blog I've yet to write...) got up and kicked some major booty singing this morning. There were some major bloopers, but that's what makes it so much fun.
I love what I do.
Here's a great picture captured by the lovely Georgia.
It was a good time.

Victory

Words can't explain how bless I am. God has given me an undying passion for children, and I get to live out that passion in the most creative and exciting way. I get to oversee about 100 kids and 30 leaders in 10 classrooms at 2 gatherings on 2 campuses. I love what I do. Sure, at times it's a bit stressful, but God is ever-so faithful to me, providing me with EXACTLY what I need at the EXACT time I need it. I am on staff with 9 amazing people who I get to laugh with, cry with and drink coffee with every week. I've been given the opportunity to live out this crazy passion that I have with these incredible and talented people. I can't explain to you how lucky I am, how good God has been to me. He brought me out of the darkest time of my life, and surrounded me with these people who bring light into my life on a daily basis. I have learned so much from each of them, and they each hold a special place in my heart. Not only to I get to live this passion out with these 9 people, but with their families too, who have quickly become MY family as well. Easter is a time to remember the happiest and most victorious day of the year- Jesus is alive. He's alive in me, and today is a day to remember the victory He's had in my life and the people he's brought into my life who have helped speak words of life back into me, and encourage me, and call out the leader they see in me. I owe so much more to these people than a silly blog... but since I can't rent the Goodyear Blimp to publicly and properly thank them, this blog will have to do... for now :)
On a different note, here are some GREAT pictures of the amazing kids and leaders I get to hang with on a given Sunday. I hope ya'll had a fantastic Easter. Jesus is so alive... we Baptized 4o-something people on Sunday... Jesus is SO SO alive!

isn't it lovely?!

Top Ten Reasons Why Life Is Good:
1. Finals are over
2. Finals are OVER!
3. I'm off work for two weeks
4. I'm going home (to Arcata) for Christmas
5. I turn 24 on Wednesday
6. The pressure's off
7. I get to see my best friend in two days
8. It's finally Winter weather out!!
9. I have THE MOST amazing team of helpers for the Stirring Kids
10. I got a french press for my Birthday... hellooo amazing coffee!!

So check out the Nativity scene the 1st-3rd grade class from the AM Stirring service made. Ava and Elizabeth are showing off their hard work. Great idea Erica. Seriously, so creative! I'm so lucky to get to work with such smart and inventive group of kids (and adults too!!). It's funny because they aren't even my kids, but I love bragging on them.

What the heck??

First of all, last night at the Stirring was INSANE. No joke, wall-to-wall seating. There was hardly any walking room... Secondly, I'm blown away by the amount of young men and women in this town who want to show love to the Stirring Kids. The Stirring Kids sign-up sheet was full. People were seriously lined up to add their name to the list. I wanted to hug each and every one of the people who came to the table... that might have gotten a little weird tho. Maybe next week. But seriously, this has got to be some sort of a record... I'm baffled, speechless, and SO EXCITED!

Excited!

Tomorrow the new week begins. I can't wait. I get to ACTUALLY meet with my Life Group this week. I love my Life Group... I get to have coffee/eat lunch with three of my greatest friends who I never really get to spend time with. My parents are coming into town. WOOOOOOT! My TV fast is over... but in all honesty, I loved the silence. I got 9 sign-ups for the Stirring Kids, and I get to call each and every one of them to tell them how excited I am that they want to be part of the Stirring Kids. This is going to be an amazing week. I can't wait. 

Emotional!

School's overwhelming. My online class is a NIGHTMARE. I study so hard for it, and do so horribly in it. Has anybody ever taken an online class? What's the trick? Ug, well I stink at school this semester. I'm usually a really good student, but this time around, I'm just not cutting it. I don't sleep enough because I'm up late doing homework, but it just seems never ending!! 

OKAY, the Stirring Kids, they're amazing. We had such a good turn out tonight! We had 9 kids in the 1st-3rd grade classroom (4 of which were girls!!! That never happens!!!) I was a bit worried going into it because each class had about 9 kids and two of the teachers were out for the night sick, but everything worked out just fine! Another volunteer showed up, and was able to step into the classroom to help. These kids are so awesome.  My favorite part of the night is our time or worship with the kids. Just watching them dance and sing, praising the Lord is so great. 

So tonight, I was holding down the fort, trying to keep kids and parents out of the rain while keeping order at the sign-in table, when a woman I'd never seen before walked up with her son and daughter. She began asking me questions about our lesson tonight, wondering what we did, when we did it, did we have snack, what class were they in. I mean, lots of questions! I answered each one, with a warm, welcoming smile (of course!) I started to explain the sign-in process to her, when she asked me to give her and her kids a second to talk. I wasn't sure what they were talking about, but by the body language of her daughter, I could tell this wasn't going to be pretty. Once both kids had joined the other children playing some fun board games (boo for the rain!) the mom pulled me aside to explain: The mother told me that she hadn't been to church in about 3 months because her children just never felt safe or had fun at any of the child watch programs. I let her know that we tend to have a LOT of fun in our classroom, and not to worry about anything. Now, to make a long story short, that same mother came to pick up her son and daughter at the end of the service, and to her shock, neither one of them wanted to leave! The mother turned to me, about in tears, and said that she gets to come back next week because her kids will want to come back. It was one of those nights that makes me LOVE doing what I do. I can't wait to see those two next week. I'm stoked at what God's doing with these kids, and in my life alike!

Ug, I'm tired and going to sleep. 

Accomplished!

So today has been a fantastic one. I got to hang out with some awesome kids (thanks Stirring Moms!!), I vacuumed my house, I washed my dishes, I swept my kitchen, I paid rent, and it's only 1:00 p.m. I'm feeling very accomplished today. I've got to say that by far the best part of the day thus far was hanging out with the kids. There were seven total. Ages ranging from 8 months (I think? I don't know exactly how old the little guy was) to about 4 (again, it's a guess). They were so much fun! I get to do it once a month for a group of moms from the Stirring. I watch the kids while they get a little "mommy" time- they go get some coffee and talk about a book they are reading. It's such a blast for me, and I don't think they even know it. The mom's look at is as though I'm doing them a favor, but in reality, THEY are doing ME a favor!!! Those kids seriously bring so much joy to my day. I get to re-evaluate my busy, hectic life, and realize that time is so precious. I need to enjoy the little moments- like dancing around the living room with 7 kids- it's fantastic!!!

The Lord continues to show me my passion for kids. I think He has huge dreams for me with children, and He continues to lay these dreams on my heart. 

"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."

Psalm 37:4

Here's a picture Erika Edwardson (one of the amazing moms in this group) took the last time I got to help them out. I love how much is going on in this picture.